Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize
