you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Randomize
