gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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