I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
A+ Viking dick
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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