It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Found your dick twin last night
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
