My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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