Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Randomize
