I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
