People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
