i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize