haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
nutella sex= disaster
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
