worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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