That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
