god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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