I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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