is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
