He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
So many bounce houses so little time
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
