I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
did i just pee glitter
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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