Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Randomize
