I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
North Korea, Best Korea!
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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