he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize
