It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
