How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
