i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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