It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
