dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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