So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
