Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
