Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
