She said her name was "party"
I accidentally burped into my bong.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
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