i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize