I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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