This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
