The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
