new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
