Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize