i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
