Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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