Have you finally orgasmed yet?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
