Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
it glows. i had to have it.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
