just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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