Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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