oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
