my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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