so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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