highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
