I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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