new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
did i walk over a car last night?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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