i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
So here I am, sexting at work.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
