spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
