Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize